...And so..I just received news that my father will not be home from NY tonight! =[ I'm so freaking bummed..like srsly!! I was looking forward to seeing him!! And it's so funny because we've only been away from each other for like a couple of days now. But I miss him like MAD. And my father and I weren't even close up until this year. And I love it. I love how close we are and I wouldn't change it for the WORLD. I used to take what I had for granted. I have both a mother and father who actually want me around. Who aren't in a hurry to shove me out of their house like 99% of American parents. Who are happy just having a nice family dinner and spending quality family time. They make me so happy and I'm so thankful! And now, living on campus doesn't seem all that glitzy without my backbone being with me. I'm printing off the cancellation form myself tonight and turning it in on monday. If me moving out of this house will cause ruckus, I don't want to do it. I don't want to mess up what we have together. Teenagers as a whole are just ungrateful little shits. They want to get really far from their parents so they can party & sex. Well..at the moment, my parents are becoming more open to the dating scene and accepting the fact that I am indeed getting older. So screw dorm life..I don't need it. And I surely won't bitch about moving out to move into a 5 by 5 room with a matchbox sized bed. Plz. The more I asked myself what's the real reason I want to move out, the more I couldn't provide a solitary answer. I only kept on making excuses for moving out. It used to be: "I want to move out to be with Jerod" Why is it that whenever I think about what Jerod and I had.....I'm not sure. it sort of drew me away from my parents. I was a 16 year old trying to seclude myself from my parents. How stupid. Independent or not, I always want my parents and brother to be my best friends. I don't care who I'm dating, what I'm doing, where I'm living...They need to be in my life. Speaking of brother..We agreed we'd get a tatt of two A's intertwined when he turns 18. Which is going to be awesome. I'll be saving a spot either on my right or left shoulder blade for that tattoo. I'm not even sure if I want anything else tatted on me at the moment to be honest. Nothing else comes as close to important as the matching tattoo I will be getting with my brother. <3 I love him sooooooooooooooooooooooo MUCH! I swear, I always want to be my brother's best friend no matter what. He's the best ever. And I love him. And I wouldn't trade him for the world. Even though I used to wish he was a girl when he was younger. Lolz. He's amazing. I'm already thinking of ways to surprise him this christmas! I love my baby bear! And the smile on his face is better than any gift in the whole world. Family love is the best love ever. And my eyes keep on filling with tears I'm so thankful for what I have.

In other news, I'm swamped in work. ;__; and Finals week is next week! Yayyyy! And california on fridayyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In other other news, I made a promise to myself to stop settling for less and stop stressing over if guys want to be stupid. For those of you who have been wondering, I haven't been talking to Dimitri like I have been. Which is funny because we used to talk almost every day and now that I did admit that I liked him. We don't talk at all. Which is fine. Shit happens. There are so many guys trying to "holler" right now and none of them are my type. AT ALL. I'm not dating party promoters, rappers, sneakerheads, pant-saggers, or any other stereotypical black guys. I'm just not. It's stupid. I figure if I wait around long enough, I'll bump into someone that is worth my time. He's simply not here yet! >_< I need to find him where ever he is.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY NEXT POINT!! Where do all the beautiful brothers on television come from?! I'm so serious. You never see guys that look like that in real life and in the rare occasion that you do, he's a biggest jackass that you ever did meet in your Godforesaken life. I am convinced that these handsome brown beauties come from some uncharted island located in some desolate area of the ocean. They probably prance around topless with their beautiful brown pecks glistening under the warm sunrays. -sigh- I will find that island. And I will take a few of them for myself. Like a buffet, and I'll load my damn plate. >_>

I'm about to look shittastic this week for I'm saving the cute stuff for cali! Lol!

Tomorrow we [Baby bear, Shellen, Jabari, And I] are going to the zoo and the aquarium! Bet your bottom dollar I'll have tons of photos up on flickr!! ;D

Okay..Spanish homework timeee!! xD <3